|JOY, like a spring in the desert|
I know Bill cared for me. He may have even loved me. I cared for him. But I was young and not nearly as serious as he seemed to be about our relationship. He went to the park that night to attend a party-one that had become controversial on our small, church-related campus. My remembrance is that Bill went to be a witness - in deed, not words - that one could attend a party, hang with friends, have a great time and choose not to drink. It seemed a cruel injustice when walking home from the party he was hit by a motorcycle and suffered injuries that claimed his life.
With all those memories stirred up, it is not surprising to me that I have been dreaming that last few nights. While the dreams do leave me with a sad feeling when I awake, I try always to receive my dreams as gifts. For example, I dreamed I took a walk with Bill. I don't remember what we talked about. But I remember the feelings of warmth and companionship we shared. And, I know my husband was waiting for me at the end of our walk. So, it is like I had a visit from Bill, a chance to catch up with him, much like I caught up with my other college friends over the weekend. And I am grateful for this dream.
If you are dreaming dreams about your loved one, try to accept them as a gift. Ask yourself, what part of the dream stands out most in my mind? What was I feeling in the dream? Was I sad or scared? Or did those feelings come upon waking? Is there something I can learn from this dream? Is there a memory here for me to recall and cherish? Is there wisdom in my dreaming, something God or my loved one would like me to learn or know?
You may wish to keep a notebook or journal beside your bed where you can journal your dreams. This can be helpful as many dreams slip away quickly upon waking. It will also give you an opportunity to see if there is a common theme that recurs in your dreams. A common theme in my dreams is going into or moving through various parts of a house. In Jungian Psychology and dream symbolism a house may represent the inner self or the soul. Paying attention to what rooms or levels of the house I am in can bring me new insights about soul work I am doing or, more likely, need to be attending too.
If you are suffering from nightmares, night terrors or having flashbacks, you have likely experienced a traumatic loss. Don't try to get through this alone. You need the help and support of a professional trained in trauma intervention. Your dreams are trying to help you by bringing these disturbing memories up where they can be faced and dealt with. No one wants to have to face them, but this is the truest path to healing. If you need assistance in locating a professional with the training and expertise to help you with your traumatic loss, please contact me or contact The National Institute for Trauma and Loss in Children at www.starrtraining.org/tlc. This organization maintains a database of trained and certified professionals in many fields who work with both traumatized children and adults.
Until next time, I wish you blessings and meaningful dreams.